The post which is coming up is likely to offend the ”chattering classes” but lets get on with it. The saga of Mr Assange has gone to a new level, the government of Ecuador has chosen to grant asylum to him.
Julian is fearful that if he ends up in Sweden that he will be packed onto a flight from the land of Volvos, ABBA and meatballs which will then take him to the USA. He fears that once in the USA he will end up in some dark dungeon. But it is interesting that recently (before the sex crime scandal) he wanted to live in Sweden.
Now lets look for a moment at Mr Assange as a person, my legal advisor pointed out to me last night that before be was accused of the third most serious crime in the criminal justice system he was quite willing to visit Sweden and he was willing to expose himself to harm by picking up a young lady who he did not know well.
I have known for years that in terrorism and cloak and dagger stuff that a classic method is to get a person who is sexually attractive to a person to lure them away to some private spot. Either that attractive person will harm the person or set them up for capture. If Mr Assange was so scared of the Americans grabbing him then why was he willing to go with a person he did not know. This method has been used by terrorists in Northern Ireland and by countless organisations. It is so well known that it is a classic staple of spy novels which you can find at any airport or at WH Smiths.
My legal advisor got me to consider the question of “is Mr Assange’s motivation in wanting to avoid going to Sweden based on his desire to avoid facing the accusation that he is a sexual criminal rather than he desire to avoid becoming a house guest of the USA”. This was an interesting question which I am sure only Mr Assange can answer.
I would also like to point out something else, Mr Assange made a living out of irking governments and very powerful people. He must have made countless enemies by now, I would reason that he would be very well advised to keep a low profile and avoid getting into conflicts which could escalate. I can think of several people I know who have or have had easy access to things which could be of interest to foreign intelligence services or terrorists. None of these people go around yelling to the rooftops about how they have an important job and have access to XYZ. These people when they are “off duty” and in retirement are very careful regarding what they tell people about their work.
Rather than picking up a new girlfriend (woman B) for sex at a party held in your honour by a new girlfriend (woman A) and other things which raise your profile. I think Assange would be far better going for a walk with a dog (never twice using the same route), buying a pizza at ICA going home, cooking the pizza, eating it, watching TV (or editing his latest revelation) and then going to bed for an early night. Of course to reduce the risk of being grabbed outside the supermarket I would suggest that sometimes he get his pizza from Willies, Hemköp or that little independent supermarket. Perhaps he would go and eat a Max burger once in a while, I think that buying a fast food meal (randomly choose a ready cooked burger) would give the assassin much less chance to poison your food than if you go into a POSH place and ask for a meal to be cooked for you (out of your sight).
That is if the assassins and spies which Julian so fears do exist.
While you might laugh at my idea of dog walking Assange buying pizza at the supermarket, it is quite a safer way of life than many. If someone was going to poison or drug him then if he is buying food randomly at the supermarket and then taking it home and cooking it without letting it out of his sight then it would make a would be assassin or kidnapper’s job much harder than man who lives by clockwork or one who goes around seducing pretty ladies. If Mr Assange is reading this blog post then I have to say that sadly it is rather too late for him to heed my suggestion, I think that right now he is not able to visit Tesco or Safeways at will but maybe after the legal system is no longer interested in him he could try living this calm life which I suggest.
Now back to Mr Assange’s current domestic arrangements, I have seen some suggestions that he should be granted citizenship by Ecuador and then given a diplomatic passport by this nation. The problem I see with this is that a diplomat needs to be a person who is approved of by the host country. I do not think that Mr Assange would be viewed as an acceptable person for one second by the UK government.
While normally a diplomat (Z) from country X is suggested by country X as possible representative in country Y. Country Y then has the option of not allowing Z into the country under diplomatic papers or if Z does something very bad then country X can require Z to leave their country.
But to try to use the idea of diplomatic immunity to allow a fugitive from justice to leave an embassy under the cover of a diplomatic passport is something which I think is going against the spirit of the law. If Assange wants to become a diplomat for Ecuador then I respectfully would like to suggest that he should first travel to his new home country, and then he should file an application to become the new ambassador in some interesting place.
I am not sure what should be done if an attempt is made to take a man sized diplomatic package out of the embassy, I think that in the interests of public safety some efforts should be made to prevent the smuggling of people inside diplomatic crates. Some years ago in the UK (1980s) a large package was shipped by an embassy. It was found to contain a drugged man who had been kidnapped. Something should be done to prevent this type of misuse of diplomatic baggage being repeated.